Day 12- No Pants and other Good Times with Coworkers.

My lot seems to be cast in the direction of your nearest emergency clinic. 

Fortunately today it was not for me.

Unfortunately, it still meant that I spent the whole day in Urgent Care. 

Fortunately, the person I was with didn’t die. I think it’s because I threatened to punch his lifeless corpse in front of his mother if he did. Yeah. Image

In my defense, he is my coworker, and that would be just an awkward situation for me, if I was the last person he saw before he died. Also, the nurse thought we were a thing, which was funny enough until it was time for him to put his pants back on. 

“Haven’t gotten to that stage in the relationship?’

“HAAAAAAAAAH.” 

Well, she told us to think it over, at any rate.

I’m sure we’ll get right on that. Right after he finishes changing out of that totally charming hospital gown. The flower print really brought out the color of his lifeless “help me I’m dying” eyes and Ludwig Van Beethoven hairstyle. 

Yes, we have an insufferable hate for each other, as friends really should. 

I sure hope I’m not the only one who experiences moments like these with their coworkers. I feel like I have an overabundance of “good times with coworkers,” that probably shouldn’t have been a thing, but happened anyway because of my general heathenism. 

Not that I’m even remotely suggesting that hospitals are a fun time, but I did get to make an exceptional variety of jokes about tubes and “suction gear.” 

 

Anywho, although I spent the whole day in Urgent Care, I did not get very far into the new book I am reading, which is Tim O’Brien’s, “The Things They Carried.” I have to say that I have loved this book since high school, where I first encountered it as a monologue that one of my friends created. It was a project for our advanced theatre class (International Thespian Society, ya’ll!) and we were supposed to pick a work of art that inspired us, and write a monologue on it and then perform it. 

Just so you know, that was a really fun project, and thus solidified my theatre teacher as my mother monster. Perhaps I will upload my piece and the work that inspired it soon.

Anyway, as far as O’Brien goes, the monologue I heard inspired me to read the book in high school, and here I am again, encountering the text and loving it already. I mean, I’m only 11 pages in, but I’m ready to hump this thing to the finish line. 

 

Now, I rather doubt that I will have time to read tomorrow, as I have both minimum wage jobs to hump, but I will do my best. Otherwise, I’ll just have to fill up my blog space with “Mine benumbed libation of cream and milk bringeth all the priapean sex to mine pastures. Verily, they sayeth, tis better than thine. Unquestionably, tis peronderant to thine. Upon thee I could imbue mine acumen, but I must needs levy a tariff.”

 

That was a really bad rewrite…

So here’s the the real thing. The thing that makes me, what the boys go crazy for. Apparently, they lose their minds. Watch if you’re smart.

la la la la

 

 http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pGL2rytTraA

I’m sorry. I can’t be stopped. I am a monster. 

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